Happy parents = happy kids

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The last three months have been a whirlwind to say the least.  With the birth of our second son – Boy Part Deux (BPD), it resulted in many welcomed visitors from out of town.  From July to just short of two weeks ago, our house was a hub of activity.

These past two weeks was our first chance to get into a normal day-to-day routine.

Reality bites.

There was no additional hands to give BPD to.  Our Original Boy (OGB), is really growing up and his needs were changing almost daily.  Some days he likes mommy more.  Some days daddy is good enough for him.  And some days mommy and daddy just need a break but have limited baby sitting options at the moment.

Two kids is definitely more work than one kid.  I say this with no disrespect to OGB, but BPD is so much easier to take care of than OGB ever was three months into this two-child dynamic.  I say it all the time that this is probably because we’re also more relaxed as parents.  Maybe this has lent to a more relaxed infant??? Possible.

This past week especially has been a lesson in managing expectations.  Setting the bar too high leads to disappointment.  But setting the bar too low can lead to frustration.  We are relearning the lesson of communicate, communicate, communicate.

Happy parents = happy kids.

Childhood is just a moment in time that passes too quickly

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Here’s a snapshot of a quick 5 minute playtime in our friend’s garage.  None of the kids cared what they played with, where they were, who did what. Tthey were just all in the moment.

Sharing the experience of raising a young family with other friends with young families is really a godsend.  It allows us to share our experiences and ideas to help us get through the difficult moments and more importantly celebrate the victories.  It also gives our children a safe place to be themselves.

In the four years, since becoming parents, we’ve realized what matters the most are the quiet moments. When you’re in the middle of trying to grasp what to do with your crying baby or your toddler throwing a trantrum – everything seems like an eternity at that moment. In between these moments, is also series of quiet moments that are so precious and sublime that the value of it is not fully realized until it has passed.

Sibling Love

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We named BPD months before he was born so that OBG can start relating to him as a person not just a concept.  I think it’s paid off since OGB is so utterly sweet around his baby brother.  He comes over and greets him, “Hello Little Boy” and gives him a kiss.  OGB also tries to be helpful getting diapers for us when BPD gets changed.   He also calls my wife when BPD is crying and says, “Mama, he’s hungry.”

For the most part, OGB does not appear to be jealous of the new member of the family.  It’s definitely a balancing act to make sure we give OGB enough attention. I just hope they grow up to be as close with each other as I am with my brothers and sister.

Siblings are the people we practice on, the people who teach us about fairness and cooperation and kindness and caring – quite often the hard way.  ~Pamela Dugdale

Are you smarter than your smart phone?

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It only took 10 years.  I got my first smart phone and I love it!

The wifey was using an original hand-me-down iPhone that finally died just before the birth of BPD.  I was using an old Nokia phone (remember the game ‘Snake’).   That’s how old it was.

Finally, we took the plunge and decided to get new cell phone plans which included some data Surprisingly, we didn’t even use any data in our first month since wi-fi is readily available everywhere — even at our local drug store.

As you can see, we opted for a Samsung Focus Windows Phone 7.  Yes, it’s not an iPhone and we don’t have the App Store.  But it is surprisingly good.  OGB is able to navigate through the interface quite quickly and find his Diego and Yo Gabba Gabba videos.

Smart phones are the all around pacifiers.  It not only pacifies the kids but it also pacifies the parents.  My wife and I use it more than our actual computers. It’s also toned down the itch to get an iPad.  So really, getting smart phones was a cost-saving measure. Facebook, Twitter, Netflix, built-in photo and video cameras, calendars, shopping lists, email, web browser and some games to distract me on my commute — just about everything modern-day parents like my wife and I need.

Dramatic Entrances: Original Boy vs. Boy Part Deux

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The Original Boy (OGB) was born two weeks late after 24 hours of labour (plus days of pre-labour), wife reaching 9 cms, just to end up with a section, and out-of-town grandparents rescheduling their flights no less than 3 times just to be at the birth. 

Boy Part Deux (BPD) came two weeks earlier than anticipated with my wife bravely getting through labour with no drugs, and an overzealous OB-on-call at the hospital during the delivery.  I’ll spare everyone the gory details but all I can say is thank God for our midwives.   Yes, natural child birth is a messy beautiful affair.

On a side note, the day before BPD’s birthday, in the early morning, OGB had peed in his bed for the first time. Less than 3 hours later, my wife woke me up and in almost disbelief informs me that  her water broke.  My first reaction was “why is everyone leaking this morning.”

2 weeks early and 2 weeks late.  The two boys just swaped their original due dates for their birthdays.  I was actually hoping they would have the same birthday. 

Both of my sons birthdays were equally dramatic but it was just a lesson in Parenting 101 – expect the unexpected and that things don’t always go as planned.  You just got to make sure there’s lots of love to go around. 

P.S.  I bow down to my wife.  Giving birth is not for the faint of heart.

The Boy Part Deux

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This picture was taken just a few days after the boy part deux was born.  My wife, for whatever reason, likes to take pictures of me sleeping with my boys. 

Last night, I stumbled upon a blog post on the ‘best parenting advice i never got’.   Reading the piece,  reminded me of the time when we first became parents.  Everything seemed like a big deal.  I expected way too much of myself and didn’t have the sense to realize when it was time to ask for “HELP”.

It’s been almost a month since boy part deux arrived.  Recently, I commented to my wife that this baby seems to be more easy going.  My wife replied back, “Maybe, we’re more easy going”.  Don’t get me wrong, having two kids vs. one is by no means easier.  But, maybe, just maybe, we have evolved as parents.  So we’d like to think.

Father x 2

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I am now a father x 2.  My wife and I welcomed to the world our second son almost a month ago now.  It’s definitely an exciting time. 

This is my second attempt at writing a dad blog.  Maybe having two kids will cause for twice the inspiration.

Stay tuned.